I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
