please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
