Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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