she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
