i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
