Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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