i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
