Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
