I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize