would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
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