I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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