Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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