I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I just want to make out with him forever
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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