Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I need a beard to bite.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
