They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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