I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
A bitchslap is in order.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
