VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Enjoy the penises
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize