I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
