went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
