drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
