Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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