And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
