so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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