we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
