He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Randomize
