Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
he thought i was a dude.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
