This show inspires me to have sex in space
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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