Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
