I hate all girls vehemently.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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