Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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