i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
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