Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Randomize
