Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
