4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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