You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
My dick has a subreddit
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
