You work out of a Hotel?
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
