She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
