You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Randomize
