bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I just found a bag of teeth...
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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