have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
