I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
