I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
