Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
