There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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