found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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