Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
