WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
i barfeds in our rink
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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