He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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