it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
