If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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