and i looked up. we had an audience...
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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