I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
