12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
